Last week I thought I was pregnant.
17th
2009
I’ve had two legitimate pregnancy scares since I’ve had Madeline. The first was at my 6 week postpartum appointment. The nurse measured my height, took my weight and asked some pretty general questions.
Nurse: So, how are things going Mom?
Me: Great!
Nurse: Are you breastfeeding?
Me: Yes.
Nurse: Have you had sexual intercourse since giving birth?
Me: ……………………………yesssss.
Nurse: Okay, let’s get a urine sample.
Me: Okay– wait, WHAT? O_O
Off she skipped, leaving me to my thoughts and that dreaded little plastic cup. After waiting forty-five minutes for my results to come back, I had pretty much worked myself up into a tizzy. By the time she came back in, I had mentally come full circle: OMG, she just took a urine sample. That means I could be pregnant, again! GOD, HELP ME. Madeline is 6 weeks old, so that means I’ll have two kids under a year old at the same time. WHAT. AM. I. DOING? I’ll have to quit work, get a double stroller, move into a bigger place and I’ll eventually need a boob job, no doubt. Well, that part’s not so bad. And actually, new babies are cuddly, sweet and smell flipping good. Awww, I wonder if it’ll be a boy this time. No, I don’t think I can handle a wiener. I think I want another girl – a little sister for Maddie. Ahhh, they are going to have so much fun shopping together when they’re older! Maddie and… gosh, I need another name. Another ‘M’ name, or is that too cheesy? Maybe a ‘J’, after Justin this time. Wait, what the heck am I thinking?! I CAN’T BE PREGNANT AGAIN… I will DIE.
Needless to say I wasn’t pregnant back in January, but last Thursday I went through a similar thought process when I realized I was a full week late. This time, I shared my possible exciting news with Stephanie, who proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon showing me pictures of her adorable new brother and sister. Torture! By 5:00, I was actually looking forward to going home and taking a pregnancy test. I had 2 sets of first & middle names and a few options for nursery decor picked out. Pro.
Well, I’m definitely not pregnant. Ah, the wonders of nature. At least now I know if it does happen by accident, I’m not going to die. I might even be happy about it. :)
Haha..that’s would be really scary,right??I always thought I was pregnant if my period is late.
on August 17th, 2009 at 8:06 pm
I’m the best influence ever.
:-D
on August 17th, 2009 at 8:52 pm
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PS
you really have a beautiful daughter
on August 17th, 2009 at 9:21 pm
hehe….oh geezers!
but how wonderful would that be ;)
on August 17th, 2009 at 9:25 pm
thank you steph i was afraid of maddie being an only child there for a while and be being an only child threatened to kill her if she left maddie to that fate! and congrats on not being preggers morg.. love you..
on August 17th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
Ahahahahaha!
on August 17th, 2009 at 10:10 pm
Haha! I think I am pregnant almost every month, but last one, I was pretty certain. Then when I wasn’t, I was sad! Crazy what those emotions do to you!
on August 17th, 2009 at 10:17 pm
gross.
on August 18th, 2009 at 1:22 am
Ok: 1) really? At only 6 weeks post? I couldn’t even think about that until closer to 10 weeks post.
and 2) I had that paranoia a few times ONLY I don’t want another. One of my friends is currently 10 weeks along with #2 and it was an “oops!” — her daughter is younger than mine!
on August 18th, 2009 at 7:02 am
Lord, if I were pg 6 weeks after giving birth, I would die. SEriously. But if I were pg with an 8 month old, I’d be all over it. I’m glad you’re okay with whatever happens. I seriously live vicariously through bloggers with babies. It’s mass love for me!!!
on August 18th, 2009 at 7:35 am
@di-hoo: Daniel, stop reading my blog. lol
on August 18th, 2009 at 8:08 am
omg, morgan, SIX WEEKS?! you are hilarious. That happened to my mom. She went in for her six week post partum check up after having me and found out she was having my brother. We’re 10mos apart…Every year after his bday, for 2 months we’re the same age,until my bday. LOL! It’s so weird. And I don’t think I understood the full meaning of it all until I went to my OWN 6wk check up and thot oh dear god. lol!!!
on August 18th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
lol at “gross”
i want to say that was funny but at the same time so not funny!!!
on August 18th, 2009 at 4:53 pm
This post is HILARIOUS!
on August 18th, 2009 at 9:29 pm
I seriously LOLed and then wondered how on earth you were able to do it before six weeks. I was so scared of even the though of that happening….
on August 18th, 2009 at 11:17 pm
Haha, this post cracked me up.
That must have been the longest 45 minutes wait of your life thinking about all the possibilities.
on August 19th, 2009 at 10:55 pm
Oh my gosh, I do the SAME thing basically every time I feel the slightest bit queasy or have achy boobs. I freak out and swear this is it, I’m knocked up again! My husband swears I’m keeping the pregnancy test companies in business. Thanks for coming by my blog, if you end up making the jcrew inspired tuxedo tank let me know, I’d love to see pics!
on August 20th, 2009 at 4:23 pm
You’re hysterical! I loved your little conversation with yourself.
Sounds like your pregnancy scares have at least helped you come to terms with the idea! So as scary as it may seem, that must help!
I’ve been having all of these crazy pregnant dreams lately! Now THAT is scary.
on August 20th, 2009 at 8:20 pm
hahaha, we go to the same ob and I can picture everything about that appt! Sooooo funny. Wait. That sounded just WRONG. But you know what I mean. Anyway, that’s exactly how I knew I was ready for our 1st anyway- I was a teeny TINY TINY bit bummed a test came back negative.
on August 20th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
Hello! found your blog today, very cute. Just thought I’d say hi!
on August 21st, 2009 at 4:29 pm
how bout you send your next pregnancy scare to me? ;) I’ll take it!
on August 26th, 2009 at 10:10 am
I went into hysterics this last week thinking I may be pregnant again…at first I thought “We can’t possibly do this”…then I reminded myself, “if I am then God will take care of us cuz it’s not like we weren’t trying to prevent”. With that I felt more relaxed and the idea didn’t scare me anymore. It would of actually been a nice addition to my sex ed class…”Mrs. Faust What if you use a condom…isn’t that safe?”…”No class…I used one and now look what happened.” lol! Part of me now wished it did (a very small part) :0).
on September 6th, 2009 at 10:33 pm