I’m really not that hairy, I promise.

The other night, I realized my girlstache was getting out of control and decided it was time to fix that mess. Now, here’s a little background info for all of you who haven’t had the opportunity to peek under my bathroom sink… it’s like a hair-removal CIRCUS under there. I have super magnifying mirrors, razors, waxes, strips, creams, tweezers, gels, and about 5 different types of post-removal lotions to restore moisture and calm skin irritation. Pro.

Back to the other night. My method of choice was this cream you spread on the hair, let sit for 8 minutes, then wipe off. Easy peasy and PAINLESS because… wimp. I’m all about the comfort these days. Also, after just having a conversation with my sisters in law about getting a pimple mustache after a lip wax, I was too scarred and terrified to attempt it.

Seriously, doesn’t that scare you just thinking about it? A mustache of pimples?! THE HORROR.

So, I busted out a tube of this nice, non-pimple causing lotiony stuff and put it on my lip. Hmmm… I thought, that spot’s a tad fuzzy too. Let’s just add a liiiiiiiiiiiiittle more. Aaaaand, let’s deal with these sideburns… waitwaitwait, dab a little between the eyebrows. Ahh, better. And this went on until I basically covered my entire face in this white lotion.

Quite pleased with myself, I pranced out into the living room, right past Justin, and into the kitchen to grab a snack while I waited for the stuff to take effect. At one point, he looked up at me and raised his eyebrows, then turned back to what he was watching on tv. It didn’t even phase him. That’s love, right there. Or maybe he’s just used to my weirdness, I can’t be sure.

This had me thinking though…  I am totally private about certain things like going to the bathroom, but completely open about others, like the mustache thing. Are all couples as open about silly things like this as we are? Or would you absolutely DIE if your husband saw you waxing your upper lip?

40 thoughts on “I’m really not that hairy, I promise.

  1. we are the same way – we do not go to the bathroom with the door open nor do we have extensive conversations about my period (he does of course always know when it’s the time but we limit the talk about it) and I try to keep maintenace things fairly quiet although I was mortified the other day when he cleaned the house before having a few of his friends over and managed to leave my facial hair removing cream on our dining room table!

  2. There are a ton of things that I let my husband see that I am not ashamed of. We have both used the bathroom in front of each other (I can’t poop in front of him though. NO WAY. He has no problem with it though). However, for some reason I am really embarrassed about my upper lip hair and will shut myself in a bathroom with the door locked to take care of it. Unfortunately, hubby can sense the moment I lock the door because he will be at the door knocking and asking me what I am doing. If I tell him, or he sees me with the white goop on my lip, he will make fun of me. I can’t win.

  3. I’ll pee in front of Dave, but I will NOT go number 2 in front of him. Or allow him to do that in front of me. There are limits! I also don’t care, I tweeze and shave in front of him, put on face/pimple masks, etc. No shame!

  4. Weirdo.

    Yeah, we do all that weird stuff in front of each other (and why are people bringing up pooping, who poops in front of each other?? GROSS!). I just hate when he will STARE AT ME, like ok, I am doing whatever opening, that doesn’t mean you have to stare. Like when I am tweezing eyebrows or something. STOP STARING!

  5. I just fell in love with you even MORE because you mentioned the girlstache thing. Seriously, NOBODY ever talks about this, & I’m so glad you are/did.

    In a lot of ways, I’m very open with Jonathan. I’ll pee with the bathroom door open. I’ll walk around the house with my hair damp (& curly) looking like a mushroom head. I’ll even have him take a look if there’s a questionable bump or feeling “down there.” But what I simply cannot do is show him that I’m getting rid of my girlstache. I guess it’s because I kind of pretend like it doesn’t exist; like it happens to other women, but not me. It’s embarrassing, the thought of having upper lip hair. I HATE IT, & because of that hate, I choose to keep it on the DL. So, I’ll take care of it while he’s gone, or while I’m in the shower (I use Nair, which works in less than 3 minutes). Otherwise, no… I’m not very open about something like that.

  6. I would die. I have my lip-stuff stashed in a secret place, and even if it gets a little out of control – I notice the BF staring at my top lip. Meaning, I guess it was time to wax days ago.

    I wouldn’t dare let him see me during that process, or post-lip hair removal. I even put concealer on and wear it to BED HAAHHAHA

  7. hehe. you should’ve posted a pic of your hairless white face. :)

    i think i am super weird, especially around the hubs. i wear my face mask without second thought, but i don’t pee with the door open. ewww. :)

  8. so does that stuff work??? becuase I’ve had mine waxed before, but never done anything at home…and I’ve never had a pimplestache after waxing…just sayin’! :)

  9. LOL I think we all have things like that we do to our boyfriends/husbands. I HAVE to close the door to the washroom when going pee, but I can shower with an audience. Weird. OH but I can’t towel off in front off him. Sorry, WAY TMI!

  10. dude. i had a skype date with matt last week and i sat there and talked to him with pimple cream on my face. i was all, listen. this is what you married, how in love are you with this!? :)

    it was great. and no, we have no shame. lost that a long time ago.

  11. I would be all about being open about stuff like that. He’s your husband! If he can’t handle that, what CAN he handle, yanno what I mean?

  12. We’re open about everything. Well except for pooping b/c isn’t that a given?! GROSS PEOPLE.

    Any pride I may have had (no, i never had any) would’ve flown out the window when he offered to shave my lady bits when I was 9mos preggo with Isaiah…and then had to watch me give birth through said lady bits.
    And then again 3yrs later.
    Soooo, yeah.

    Also? I am scared to death to put any hair removal or bleaching creams on my face (b/c if I did I would prolly get carried away and just mask my entire face. Also I’m nervous the cream will turn me all white in spots & I’ll look like some failed attempt to be like Michael Jackson or something)…
    So, long live my lady ‘stache! And sideburns. Ha.

  13. With all you people talking about stache-trimming, I’m totally paranoid and counting the minutes until I can leave and check my stache with my magnified mirror at home. I don’t think I have one?! eep! I’ve always thought I was good in that department until I was like forty.. Pardon me while I go to the bathroom and “reapply my lip gloss” (actually going to go scrutinize my facial hair situation).

  14. i have to know – did it work? no burnt skin? i have never attempted mustache hair removal, but it sounds so easy that i am intrigued….

  15. Morgan, I love you! I love that you just wrote about girlstach!! I have recently wondered the same thing, if I was a bad wifey for doing secret girl things in front of the hubs! He caught me tweezing my chin hairs the other day….busted! I can’t decide if I am embarassed or think its funny! lol

  16. Girlstache? BAHAHAHA! Love that! I deal with that too, unfortunately. I do all that crap in front of him, but I don’t actually CRAP in front of him. Basically, #1 and #2 are private for both of us. That, and anything dealing with tampons. He gets grossed out, and well, yeah – it is gross.

  17. Um… watch out with that “lotion” stuff. It gave me a chemical burn one time. So instead of a pimply mustache, I had a chemical burn mustache that took WAY longer to go away than the pimples. It was… um… embarrassing to explain!! It was also 8 years ago and I’ve been waxing ever since.

    Kyle and I are close door bathroom users but open with a lot of other things. I mean… I man-scape FOR him. So we’re comfortable with body hair removal around here.

    I feel like I just gave too much information.

  18. while i’m super open about most everything in our relationship, sometimes i also see the “harm” in it… because after all, after we get a little older, that stuff is gonna go from cute/endearing to… well, creepy. :\

    plus sometimes it’s hard to be romantic with each other after… say… the other day when i sneezed and peed all over the floor for 30 seconds and stood there with my mouth open and my husband was like, “what. the. hell.”

    pregnancy pretty much removes any privacy issues, i think. sucks.

  19. Getting rid of that girl-stache is so minuscule when you’ve been with someone going on six years. When you have only one bathroom and two people, there is zero privacy and zero embarrassment. Locks on bathroom doors? Meh. Covering your girly/boy bits? Riiigghhht! I don’t know when’s the last time I took a shower by myself, went on the toilet without him being in there at the same time, or giving me that ‘you’re gonna be so hairy when you get older’ smirk when I’m shaving everything from my arms down. Suggestion: I never pluck my eyebrows or Nair my upper lip anymore. I would give threading a try, that’s the only way I do it now :-D

  20. I CANNOT believe I am admitting this, but there is ONE whisker type hair on my lower chin that I just cannot reach. I make my husband get it, even though he *swears* he can’t see it every time. Everything else is super private though!

  21. We don’t go to the bathroom in front of each other. And I lock myself in the bathroom with a magazine when it’s time to get rid of my girlstache. Yes, I’m shy that way, despite him watching me give birth to our baby girl.

  22. Luckily I’ve never had to wax my upper lip but I imagine if I had to, my partner wouldn’t really think anything of it. I believe that when boys love girls they put up with pretty much all of our less sexy moments, like waxing, shaving, farting etc. :P

  23. unfortunately… i am one of the many that are labled: fuzzy…. aka very mammal like or peach fuzz. my husband makes fun of me and tells me when i need wax. i dont care tho cuz id rather have him notice than a stranger stare at me. we dont discuss poop, farts, or periods tho. he thinks girls arent suppose to fart for some reason, so we just dont go there, and i run out of the room when nature calls. basically bloody vaginas and baby birth makes him nautious and literally gag, LOL i just laugh at him. i am very open and can discuss any matter.

  24. Eh, my hubby and I have lived together long enough that we pretty much do everything is front of each other. Sort of sad.

  25. Ok girl. Your blog seriously cracks me up. I love it. Please be my new best friend. lol.

    Oh and I pretty much do whatever unflattering thing I need to in front of hubs. And he’s so used to me walking around with some weird crap slathered all over my face or whatever that he doesn’t even flinch. I was really into those Biore Pore strip things a few years ago… I’d leave them on forever and he never even said anything. Maybe he thought it was the hotness. True love.

  26. I am hairy, and I wax. I usually do it when I am in the shower and husband nev er really sees, it’s just worked out that way. Even though I wouldn’t care if he did, I don’t think he’d care either.

  27. well I am a hairy italian girl so yeah, I have the same cream. Jon and I are REALLY open about a lot but for some reason I am not cool with him knowing I have enough of a stache to necessitate cream. Maybe it is a hang up of mine but I just can’t openly admit to it ya know? ha!

  28. Hmm…my wife and I have been married almost 5 years now and the bathroom isn’t really private domain anymore. Were quite open in that area even though it was never like that before. I know when she waxes and it doesn’t bother me at all, heck sometimes I even pay for it myself as a little treat to her.

  29. Hubs has seen me at my very very very worst.

    and he still loves me. which is either miraculous or disturbing, i’m not sure.

  30. I don’t really mind peeing in front of my husband, but I try to avoid it. Going number two in front of him is a big no. Anything else really doesn’t bother me.

  31. This post. is. awesome. Thank you so much for sharing about your mustache – I have also been cursed with one, and have even endured a pimple mustache once or twice after a “nair” mishap. It ain’t pretty. Ask the hubby…

  32. oh, and about going to the bathroom in front of each other… we are pretty open about it. like, anything goes. not sure how that happened. we waited until we were married to see each other naked, have sex… day 1 of honeymoon: peein’ with the door wide open. not sure how the heck that happened?!

  33. I tried to be normal and hide some things from my husband. I wouldn’t even bleach my upper lip hair when he was in the house. Well, tonight I was home alone while hubs was out with the boys (or so I thought), so I started doing my little biweekly bleaching ritual. Ten minutes later, hubs came back to retrieve something he’d forgotten and saw me in all my bleach-covered glory. He started chasing me around and chanting, “Bleachy, bleachy!” (Yes, I married a 3-year-old, apparently) I guess it could’ve been worse, but I don’t know how I will ever live this down.

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