Sometimes I really want to get all Bon Qui Qui on mall people. Not the ones who go there to actually buy stuff, but the ones who just stand around and get in the way of the fine citizens who do.


It’s 10:00 in the morning on a Wednesday… how do that many teenagers sneak out of class?? And to do what, hang out in front of Victoria’s Secret while drinking a Frappuccino? GO LEARN SOMETHING!

(I must be getting old.)

This morning my friend Shea and I went to the mall with a mission…we had gift cards to spend. Normally I would reserve this type of outing for when Maddie and Jack are somewhere far, far away and unable to hinder my shopping joy with their screams and poop. Loading up two kids in the beastly double stroller and weaving your way through a crowd of 8,000 slow moving shoppers is not what most people would call sane, but my old friend MAC was calling my name. And an addict’s gotta do what an addict’s gotta do.

Anyway, we managed to make it out alive. Yes, my right eye was twitching and I’m pretty sure I pulled a muscle, but now I have a few new eye shadows and a lipstick so it was all worth it.

Now it’s time to watch some makeup tutorials and get all fancy for no reason at all. I love staying home.

22 thoughts on “Sakurity!

  1. You're hysterical. I think this week is Spring/Easter/Passover break (@ least it is in NY)…so that's probably why all the kids are at the mall! But, i totally feel you. GO LEARN SOMETHING!! :)

  2. Just wait till Maddie is older then she will love helping you choose make-up and no doubt decorate herself with all the testers at the same time lol :) I find it very strange shopping with only my son now, the 'I realy have no interest' look just kills the fun haha :)

  3. You're hysterical. I think this week is Spring/Easter/P​assover break (@ least it is in NY)…so that's probably why all the kids are at the mall! But, i totally feel you. GO LEARN SOMETHING!! :)

  4. It’s Spring Break where I live…so that could explain the excessive number of teens. Still, there’s no excuse for being annoying/in the way.
    Glad to hear you got some new (free!) makeup goodies to play around with.

  5. I worked at the Mall of America for 7 years. My least favorite thing in the world was trying to weave through all those darn people who didn’t seem to know how to stand or walk.

    “Why are you spread out so wide and walking so slowly?! Can’t you tell I’m behind you?!”

    “Don’t stand in front of the elevator when you’re waiting to get on! People need to get off!”

    “Don’t stand in the middle of the place on a Saturday in the middle of the holiday season and get mad at ME for trying to push past you!”


  6. The fact that you mentioned Bon Qui Qui in this post had me rolling on the floor! Glad you survived your Spring Break Mall Nightmare, and love reading your blog!

  7. Yeah it’s definitely spring break – you should probably forgo any more outings this week ;) I agree with Steph, shopping offline is wayyyyy too much work!!!

  8. Best way to avoid this? Find your county’s public school website and bookmark it. Then before planning ANY type of outing check ALL the school calendars (traditional, year round, magnet, etc). Or….become a hermit. *sigh*

  9. You just need to put roadkill bumpers on that stroller, put your bitchface on, and get serious. They’ll move. If you aim at the small kid they’ll jump out of the way sooner, but if you take out the leader of the pack they’ll all scatter in fear.

  10. why yes. . . i just seriously pulled to the side of the road to read this because on a rainy day like today your entries insert a little joy into the condensation falling down on my once volume-luscious hair. my mom always referred to these teen groups as ”mall rats” and thank you Jesus that mom never let me hang out with them. seriously. . . i know its long over-due but mom, you were right!

  11. I work at a mall and people like that annoy me lol. I am there fighting for parking, fighting to get in and serve people who have free time to stand around and block corners and entrances…I hate the mall lol.

  12. Malls are horrible places for anyone, except teenagers, because for them it is a social experience.

    Let me give you a tip. I probably should keep this all to myself because it is when I go out in the world: Tuesdays are the best days to go anywhere. The tourists who came for the weekend leave on Monday and the next set of tourists don’t come until late Wednesday or Thursday. People who forgot to shop on the weekend, go out on Mondays. By Wednesday those who were out on the weekends have rested enough to try again. Therefore, Tuesday is the day.

  13. The picture of Bon Qui Qui looked HILARIOUS, so of course, I had to go on youtube and look her up. That was sooooo funny!!!! I keep finding myself saying ” I will Cut. You.” And I keep showing it to everyone. So hilarious! And as always, your post was great! I totally love reading them….you have a great sense of humor!!

  14. Seeing as you have only updated once in the last month, I am a little scared about my first one coming within the next couple of weeks!!! :)

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