Dove Promises, brought to you by Satan

My friend Natali was just telling me how Dove Promises are addicting and the devil and ruined her life last weekend. I hadn’t eaten any in years, so I sort of forgot the dangers of ripping open a bag. Dangers, as in YOU CAN’T STOP EATING THEM. Seriously. I’ve sucked down like 20 since I started writing this post.

Anyway, just now I was laying on the couch being totally healthy and productive in my pajamas, while watching What Not to Wear and eating copious amounts of of junk food because it’s been that kind of weekend. I happened to glance down at my “Promise” wrapper which read, Kick a bad habit for today.

First of all, what kind of “Promise” mocks you to your face? Enlighten me please. Is that what chocolate has come to, these days? It tricks you by being incredibly delicious, then it says to you, “Oh yeah, AND you shouldn’t be eating chocolate today. Get off your lazy pancake butt and go do something productive.” What a sneaky little B.

This is chocolate, people. It’s not about productivity, it’s about enjoyment. And fatness. We’re not kicking any bad habits except the habit of reading your crap Promises, Dove Devil.

And for the record, I just can’t say I have any bad habits that need kicking…

None at all.